Wake Up Calls

The day my husband was in the Emergency room and transferred to another hospital, my first thoughts were worry for his well being.  Whether he would need surgery, recovery time and research on the internet regarding the condition, procedure, mortality and life expectancy.

I consider myself to be a caring and compassionate person and have done my fair share of worrying about others over the years.  I am totally in control during the daylight hours.  What is it about when the sun goes down and we are surrounded by the dark?  The negativity creeps into the very depths of our soul.  Where we had only the well being of the person concerned before, we now have the dark scary questions that pertain only to ourselves.

Mine were: “what am I going to do to pay the bills?”, “will there be a lot of extra expenses now because of this hospital stay and possible operation?”, “We don’t have a joint account, if he dies, I’m up a creek.”

The list went on and on and by the time I’d finished, I was a mental mess.  My daughter and I had been texting back and forth and although I hadn’t told her all of the thoughts running through my head, her thoughts ran through the vein of, “what if I have to leave this job and go home for a while?”, “What if Mom can’t pay the bills and I know I have some money but not enough to help her.”

Not much sleep for either one of us that night.  I woke up in the morning with my power intact once again, knowing that I just needed to do one thing at a time…and at that moment, that was getting down to the hospital and seeing my husband.  My daughter on the other hand woke up a total mess and stayed home from work just in case she would need to catch a flight home.

I’m not proud of the fact that my thoughts could totally center on my needs at that point in time…I do realize that’s exactly what a “wake up call” is meant to do…enable you to focus on what is necessary.  Because of that night, I now have a list of things that need to be done.  We were given a reprieve this time for a reason.

til next time…Eva

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5 thoughts on “Wake Up Calls

  1. Loved the mysterious sudden heavy British Accent insight !-)
    Agree that worries, like physical symptoms, seem to get somehow magnified in the dark. The rare times I can’t seem to redirect that, Ive learned put on the headphones and play positive subliminals or crystal bowls music or some such until I can drift off to sleep in a better frame of mind. Or get up and do a brain dump on paper of all the aspects of whatever I’ve dropped into fear-thinking about, along with any positives or action steps that may suggest, then give it to the Universe to work on while I rest.

    • Thanks Jennifer…your suggestions are all good ones. I do the brain dump myself most of the time…that usually lets me get to sleep quite easily. Funnily enough, no British accent today…

  2. Atta girl! Find some silence & listen to your intuition. Intuition is heightened during times of stress due to elevated levels of, believe it or not, oxytocin. Your body wants you to be in touch with your empathic & intuitive abilities during times of stress. Not sure which thought/voice is the intuitive one? It’s the calm one guiding you without emotions like fear attached to the message. I’ll just bet your first intuitive message was in the morning silence, whispering, “Wakeup call”. There will be more to guide you. Best to you & your family. ❤ ❤ xo ~Ruth~

  3. Ohh, Eva, I was wringing my hands as I was ‘going with you’ on this journey – and I know only too well how nightime makes fears so much greater. Why does it do that?

    I have, however, come up with some words which instantly puts things in order for me:
    Don’t worry until you have something to worry about .. and then, if you find out there’s something to worry about, don’t waste time worrying. Instead, calm your mind, heart and breathing, and do something positive which will help the situation you’re in.

    It works for me, and I’ve passed this on to many people since I told myself that, many years ago, and I’m told that it’s helped others too.

    Sending love, and healing vibes through the ether. ~ Cobs. xxx

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