Looking for Faeries

Looking for Faeries

I take a walk every evening after dinner.  In one area of my walk, there is a heavily planted area filled with the sweet scent of honeysuckle bushes and blooming white dogwood trees.  Last week as I was slowly walking past, enjoying the scent of the sweet honeysuckle and evening songs of the birds, I saw the small colorful blur come flying around the corner and heard a distinct “squeak!”
It was not a bird.  It was too colorful to be a bird.  It was tinier than a bird. It didn’t sound like a bird.  So, because I desperately want to believe in faeries, I determined that, yes, this was a faerie.
I have one friend who I pretty much can tell anything to.  I quickly wrote her an email to tell her of my experience and her first response was, “Cool…are you sure it was a faerie”  Over the next day or so, she would write suggestions…was it a hummingbird?  A giant bee?  and did you see it again?…take your camera along the next time!
I went online to see if there were any suggestions on how to look for faeries and found several:

I have seen great interest in Fairy/Faerie Gardens lately…people making charming gardens in many forms…with small doors, miniature furniture and lovely flowers.
And talking about doors, several cities boast having multiple fairy doors all through the city.

Daily What?! Miniature Fairy Doors Are Popping Up All Over NYC

More fairy doors of San Francisco

Tonight I went on my walk as usual.  Every time I pass that area, I slow down and silently talk to the faeries, asking them to please give me a sign that they are there.  There is usually no one around.  Until tonight.  A young boy around 9 was on his bicycle and I didn’t hear him the first time he said hello.  He drove his bicycle close to me and said a sweet hello again.  I was startled at first but I smiled and said hello to him.  He looked at me with a question in his eyes(I knew darn well he wanted to ask me what on earth I was doing for so long just standing there looking into the bushes…) and he then looked at what I had been looking at.  When I didn’t offer any answer to his unspoken question, he smiled and left.

Next time he will ask…

No faerie sighting today…but someday I am sure…

til next time…Eva


Special People in Our Lives

We all have had special family members who have always made the effort to keep their family together.  I have seen all too often that families drift apart over the years simply due to disinterest/neglect of communicating with one another.

My cousin Hilmar is that person on my mother’s side of the family(here in the US).  Being the eldest son of five, he always has taken his responsibilities seriously.

I was an Rh-negative baby and needed blood transfusions on day 2.  I understand Hilmar was one of the first to donate blood for me.  I  am very grateful for his gift.

When he was in High School, he used to help my dad in the bakery.  It was at that time he learned baking and it became a life long hobby of his(sticky buns being a specialty) and also taught his daughter.

He was stationed in Japan while in the service and I remember his bringing back a Japanese porcelain baby doll with glass eyes and straight black hair, wearing silk pyjamas.  He also brought home a Geisha doll in a case for his mother…I would study that doll every time I went to visit my aunt.

In his working life, he was Human Resources and has been one of those amazing people who gets along with everyone.

Growing up, he and his brothers experienced outdoor life-camping, hunting, fishing…and the fishing has remained a passion for him…evolving to the love of fly-fishing and making the flies.

When my daughter was younger, every year he would pick her up for the day and she and “Uncle” Hilmar would go fishing.  He taught her the correct way to fish, use bait, etc.  Afterwards, they would go to “Big Jakes” for lunch and then he would bring her home.

Hilmar visited my parents often when they became homebound and never failed to bring them something yummy from a bakery down where he lived.  They always were so grateful that he took the time to come and visit them.

Happy Birthday Hilmar!  Just wanted to tell you how very special you are and how grateful I am that we are cousins!  Love you!

til next time, Eva


“Aunt Frances, 102”



I have not seen “Aunt” Frances since she moved and my Tuesdays that had been with her are now my weekly day off(well, most weeks anyway).  I do know from my neighbor(her niece) that she has adapted well…likes the fact that she no longer has to worry about things going wrong with her home, shopping for food and wondering how she was getting to her various appointments.

Dear “Aunt Frances” will be celebrating her 102 birthday on Tuesday and our local tv station filmed her playing her organ at her church last week…which she still does every Sunday.

What enables a person to live a long life and still be able to do as “Aunt Frances” can do?  I know she hasn’t had an “easy” life by any standards.  She and her siblings were placed in a children’s home when their mother passed away and their father couldn’t take care of them.  The girls were in one building and the boys were in another.  She married fairly young and her husband was a miner and farmer.  They had three children and at a young age, her husband died from Miners lung…leaving her and three children still in school.  At this point she worked in a clothing factory…eventually becoming supervisor and making the samples.  All this while still maintaining the farm.

She drove her car well into her 90s and it was only when the last car couldn’t be repaired that she and her children decided maybe it was time to stop driving.  She sang in a community chorus until she was 100.

I feel longevity is governed in part by our genetics, by how we’ve taken care of ourselves, our belief system. our positive outlook on life, gratitude,  and our interest in life.  “Aunt Frances” is never bored…her active role in her music, reading, sewing, crocheting, counted cross stitch, keeping track of her family and now her activities in the retirement village in which she lives.

Wishing you a lovely birthday “Aunt Frances”!

Wake Up Calls

The day my husband was in the Emergency room and transferred to another hospital, my first thoughts were worry for his well being.  Whether he would need surgery, recovery time and research on the internet regarding the condition, procedure, mortality and life expectancy.

I consider myself to be a caring and compassionate person and have done my fair share of worrying about others over the years.  I am totally in control during the daylight hours.  What is it about when the sun goes down and we are surrounded by the dark?  The negativity creeps into the very depths of our soul.  Where we had only the well being of the person concerned before, we now have the dark scary questions that pertain only to ourselves.

Mine were: “what am I going to do to pay the bills?”, “will there be a lot of extra expenses now because of this hospital stay and possible operation?”, “We don’t have a joint account, if he dies, I’m up a creek.”

The list went on and on and by the time I’d finished, I was a mental mess.  My daughter and I had been texting back and forth and although I hadn’t told her all of the thoughts running through my head, her thoughts ran through the vein of, “what if I have to leave this job and go home for a while?”, “What if Mom can’t pay the bills and I know I have some money but not enough to help her.”

Not much sleep for either one of us that night.  I woke up in the morning with my power intact once again, knowing that I just needed to do one thing at a time…and at that moment, that was getting down to the hospital and seeing my husband.  My daughter on the other hand woke up a total mess and stayed home from work just in case she would need to catch a flight home.

I’m not proud of the fact that my thoughts could totally center on my needs at that point in time…I do realize that’s exactly what a “wake up call” is meant to do…enable you to focus on what is necessary.  Because of that night, I now have a list of things that need to be done.  We were given a reprieve this time for a reason.

til next time…Eva

The British Accent

My husband unexpectedly was admitted to the hospital this week.  He’d been doing more physical jobs lately around the house(basically painting) and having had various muscle spasms before, he went to the doctor for possible muscle relaxers.  The Dr. in turn sent him to the ER.

I got a phone call from him a few hours later(I didn’t know where he’d gone), telling me where he was and that “they’re not happy with the results of the tests”.  An hour later he called again to say that he was being transferred to another hospital for further testing and would be admitted.  When I asked if he wanted me there, his response was, “no, not now…I’d rather know you were home.”  The ER doctor then called to inform me of the possible diagnosis and that he was being transferred.

I’m not going to lie, that night was pretty much a sleepless one for me…it’s natural I think to give yourself the “worst case scenario” …the “what if” questions.  My 24 year old daughter was very comforting and matter of fact over the phone…she had contacted her best friend who is going to be a cardiologist and gotten information from her.  I gradually calmed down.  The next morning, I woke up with my power…while my daughter on the other hand woke up with a total meltdown.  She stayed home from work in the event that the situation would worsen and she would have to fly home.

That day, my neighbor had off and graciously said she’d drive me down(it’s 1 1/2 hours away and I’d never been there before).  We would also later have to pick up his car at the original hospital which was in the opposite direction.

He was still in the critical care unit being monitored in all areas.  This was the first time ever in his life that he’d been admitted.  He’d had instances of same day surgery, but never had been admitted.

His voice was stronger than it had been the day before…but still on the weary side.  That evening he called me to tell me he was being transferred upstairs and that most of the monitors were coming off.  I noticed that his British accent was stronger than usual.  He’s been in the US for over 25 years now and although it generally was there faintly, the only times it generally “recharged” was when he got back to England on holiday.

The next day when I arrived, his accent had become so strong that you could cut it with a knife!  I finally understood why…my husband adores being fussed over and getting attention…especially when the nurses say things like, “Oh, I just LOVE your British accent!  I could listen to you speak all day!”(they would really be surprised if they knew how little he actually talks at home!)

He was discharged the day after and interestingly enough, the British accent is pretty well back to almost non existent now.

He was originally diagnosed as having “dissection of the aorta”…which necessitated his being transferred with options of either surgery or meds.  I contacted my Reiki teacher and she plus others did Reiki for my husband along with me.  When the surgeon came the last day, he said that when he’d checked the results the day my husband was admitted, all the test results pointed to “dissection of the aorta”.  When he checked it the next day to determine if it would either be surgery or meds, he couldn’t see that at all…it had all been cleared.  “I don’t know how it cleared, that happens sometimes and we have no answers for it…”  Now the “possibility” was that it had been a blood clot or a bruise…and that he could be discharged.

He’s home and very happy to be home.  This has been an experience we don’t want repeated and a wake-up call for both of us.  He bought himself a blood pressure monitor to keep track of his “high” blood pressure(bought the only one that was endorsed by the British Medical Association!).  The blood pressure has been within the normal ranges…He calls the Dr tomorrow to get an update this week..

I honestly don’t know what to think…

til next time…Eva

Milestones can be tricky things

003aphoto by Eva 2014

After having had a “milestone” anniversary, I got to thinking about milestones in general.

In our parents’ and grandparents’ generations, milestones were major events.  It was deemed to be quite an honor to have been in one company for 25 years and you would receive the proverbial watch and accolade from your peers.  I have a silver vase on my table that is engraved with my grandfather’s name and the fact that he worked for his company for 25 years.

The wedding anniversaries were celebrated with great fanfare as well.  I remember my sister in law’s parents’ 50th wedding anniversary in the 1960s…it was the affair of all affairs…

Oh, I know, it still happens once in a while…but for the most part, I see the trend of longevity not being as esteemed as it once was…  People are not staying in the same company(for the most part) for long periods of time if they aren’t becoming advanced.   Not usually good on a resume to have been just at one company for a large number of years.

Marriages/relationships/friendships  go through so many changes throughout the years that many don’t exist after a certain number of years.  I have been reading that we basically change every 7 years(thus the 7 year itch, I guess)…and in many cases, a lot of relationships falter then.  Is longevity in a marriage/relationship a good thing for everyone?  I don’t know anymore.  I’ve seen couples stay together who in the end have absolutely nothing in common anymore and in many cases, don’t really like each other anymore.  Others who go through the tough patches and come through stronger than ever…different but stronger.

Where exactly am I going with this?  Well, I think so many of us just glide on by in many facets of our lives.  We stay in the same job/company because of circumstance…  maybe location, family, age, fear of change.  We stay in marriages, relationships, friendships,  sometimes for much the same reason…  fear of starting over, age, family members.  I know my friendships have been gradually changing over the last few years.   When I entered the Transformation Contest three years ago, I came in contact with people who actually thought and felt the same way I did…having that deep need to continuously learn and improve our lives in some way…spiritually and physically.  Always learning new things and new ways of looking at life. Definitely made the difference.

til next time…Eva

Identity Challenged for Kitty and me

   I was talking to my 95 year old friend Angie today and telling her about our no longer having Beastie…and how Kitty was reacting to it all.  After a while, she responded with, “and how many are in your Menagerie now?”  When I told her “two” her response was, “in all the time I’ve known you, you have never just had two…how do you feel about that?”

I had just been thinking the same thing…I feel that my identity has shifted in a major way…I have always had a menagerie of sorts…at the high point, I had 9 sweet pets I was taking care of daily.   Never a chore.  Many sweet personalities and I learned from each and every one of them and loved them all.

At this point in time, I realize that I need to cherish the two I have as well as work on the areas of my life that need to be worked on…my Etsy shops, my writing and other areas that I have been thinking about for quite some time and not done.

Kitty has been giving me some concern since Beastie is gone…she gives me a look sometimes as if to say, “what have you done with her…”  I realized today that in the last year, Kitty has seen me wrapping both Benji and Beastie in blankets  and taking them away in the car…and they never came back…  She spends hours looking out of the front window…I wish she would tell me her thoughts so I could give her some answers.

But for now, I make sure Kitty gets her favorite foods, gets her ears scratched often and treating her gently.  Beastie was my lapcat…I could sit down and 10 seconds later Beastie would be on my lap and settle there for the long term.  Kitty is not a lapcat and never has been…but, never say never…  I do miss my lapcat though…

Getting used to the idea that I no longer have a “Menagerie”…

til next time…Eva

Photo by Eva of Kitty…2015